Zoe is very tall, very slim and devastatingly pretty. She could throw on any old rubbish on her back and look like she is on the cat walk. She smiles, she warms to people and she is the first one to spot you and greet you in a crowd. Not just me; she likes people and shows an innocent trust towards all her friends and acquaintances.
Anyone who knows her would envy her her life. But they don’t. What gives?
At the back of her like an ugly mural are larger than life problems; problems her frail waist and shoulders could hardly bear. There is the cantankerous and elderly mother who uses all her manipulative powers to put Zoe down and keep her down; there is mad nightmare relative who makes demands on her time and patience; five children from two absent fathers keep her busy and active although she just loves her children; she is financially strapped; her two best friends are depressives who drag her down. Need I go on? Zoe herself needs to cry sometimes in the privacy of good and understanding friends.
But Zoe looks always as fresh as a daisy and makes eye contact and talks to you like you were important to her. Of course I am flattered when she seeks me out to talk to me. So is everyone else.
I asked her one day her secret and she without batting an eyelid said “have to be positive dahling”
That was a great message for me. So I did the research and found POSITIVITY is a magic tonic. It not only keeps you healthy mentally and physically, it also creates a pleasant atmosphere wherever you go and in turn sustains you with a feeling of good will and all embracing happiness. The scientific wallahs have done their own research on thousands of people and they find a positive attitude helps you have a happy, healthy and fulfilling life. We all know what a depressive attitude does to you and all those around you. So positive does the opposite. If only for that reason, if only for the reason I don’t want to burden my friends with my woes, I would choose to be positive.
Just imagine, if you have problems and you naturally have a positive attitude you will think out solutions for your problems; you will perform better at interviews, you will attract other positive people into your circle. You will have more enthusiasm to do things, to be arty or creative. There are two main ways of seeing your life, as positive or as negative. I know which way I want to go.
And positivity can be learned, according to scientific research. So don’t lose heart. You too can be a positive person if you are not one already, and it doesn’t cost anything. Research shows positive people fall ill less regularly than negative persons, they live longer and healthier lives.
So go ahead and make a lifestyle change. Like Zoe, walk tall, smile, keep trim, smile, dress well, smile, seek out friends, smile.
Dressing well and presenting yourself well does not cost any money. The charity shops are overwhelmed by discarded clothes. I think that will be a good start. After my divorce I was too overwhelmed to pay any attention to myself. I went about in drab work clothes and there was this feeling of worthlessness around me. My sister came down and took me shopping. She made me wear fashionable trousers and jackets and made me cut my hair. The difference was incredible. It was no coincidence that soon after, I fell in love.
Zoe’s problems do not go away. They still remain behind like some dark monster mural. But she is always hopeful that there would be a light at the end of the tunnel. But she is that light. She beams positivity and makes things better for everyone else. That is what makes Zoe different and so lovable.
So smile folks; the world will love you for it, and you will live longer. Trust me!